Another Retrospect: The Inclusive Worshipper
This post was perhaps the most fun ever in 2005. Since the original Inclusive Worshipper bailed on us long ago (he/she was a spoof commentator protesting those blatantly desexualized agendas that often masquerade as theology in the Ivy League), I've copied some of the (ok, heavily edited) related comments for your essentialist viewing pleasure. Close your eyes and imagine that you are in the hallowed halls of Yale Divinity School, fresh from a chapel session on re-imagining theologies of polyamorous enactments of cryptozoology in dialogue, or something very, very similar...
4:45 PM
B said...
I am an advocate for the inclusivity and non-opressionization of those of poly-ambi-opinion.
We reserve the right to self-disclose to whom we wish, and not to those whom we do not wish. Forced self-disclosure is the height of self-imposition. It is like forcing someone to do and/or be someone or something they may or may not want to do or be. Is that clear? Equals, not nice.
Give wo/myn some space. It is not as easy for us as it is for you: member of the privileged, hegemonic, normative, self-prioritizing ouber-class. We are people too. Don't place ODDS on identity. Allow an EVEN playing field. You can afford not to take yourself too seriously. You have all the power. Fundamentalist.
I can't believe you have the nerve to blog about God/(ess) love. Extend some our way. Yeah?
Ambi-emotively,
B.
5:00 PM
MM said...
As flattered as the royal We find your presence and commentary at this heteronormative space where Christ is... Lord, please bear in mind that a) this is a crap shoot and b) Inclusive Worshippers probably do not even have egos, being in such a benevolent and gendered-continuum state O'blyss.
5:18 PM
G. said...
Inclusive worshippers deserve to become the bearer of the torch of the New Humour. Even I am not willing to go to such lengths of sublimated irony. I have heard of people who really think and say such things. Now, whether or not they go to seminary on the other hand, is another thing entire.
5:55 PM
Anonymous said...
Okay, here is what I think we know for sure: the definitive Inclusive Worshipper is probably a Unitarian, has more than one partner... she went to Smith College or perhaps Swathmore, she has short brown hair, wears clothes made out of hemp, smokes, and has trouble pronouncing the letter 'r'. Okay, maybe she can pronounce the letter 'r'. But, I think she would be reluctant to take the Eucharist. Go to Chapel tomorrow, sing your show tunes, and examine who stays seated during the mass. BINGO. That's her. But stay clear...contents my explode under pressure.
6:44 PM
MM said...
I think it discredits inclusive worshippers' sense of humor to assume they are serious. And I have NEVER met a woman this funny. I aspire to it, but its a long way away.
6:45 PM
Anonymous said...
To the vindictive and closed-minded writers of the above entries,
You all should be ashamed. Inclusive worshippers are wonderful persons with arms open to the world and a heart full of non-judgmental charity. If you want to know her true identity, look into your own hearts and see the loving, free-spirited, ambi-sexual person you've always longed to be. Then you will know her. You will see her deep within yourself, in your heart. That is where the truth lies.
Your rigid categories, gender assumptions, and archaic stereo-types belong with your kind - in the neanderthal age. Inclusive worshippers fly like... birds. You wallow in the mud of your own phalic ignorance.
Show up to the charter meeting of the SPA (Seminarian's for Polyamory Awareness) this weekend. We'd love to see you there.
9:10 AM
Anonymous said...
It has got to be a joke...no worries MM...people aren't that dumb.
12:29 PM
MM said...
Inclusive worshippers, thanks for visiting! You are welcome here. I am merely EXPERIENCING you as "funny," having been conditioned to react thusly by various Male Oppressors who comment here. I was actually hoping for more womyn. Again, welcome. Make yourself at home.
4:45 PM
B said...
I am an advocate for the inclusivity and non-opressionization of those of poly-ambi-opinion.
We reserve the right to self-disclose to whom we wish, and not to those whom we do not wish. Forced self-disclosure is the height of self-imposition. It is like forcing someone to do and/or be someone or something they may or may not want to do or be. Is that clear? Equals, not nice.
Give wo/myn some space. It is not as easy for us as it is for you: member of the privileged, hegemonic, normative, self-prioritizing ouber-class. We are people too. Don't place ODDS on identity. Allow an EVEN playing field. You can afford not to take yourself too seriously. You have all the power. Fundamentalist.
I can't believe you have the nerve to blog about God/(ess) love. Extend some our way. Yeah?
Ambi-emotively,
B.
5:00 PM
MM said...
As flattered as the royal We find your presence and commentary at this heteronormative space where Christ is... Lord, please bear in mind that a) this is a crap shoot and b) Inclusive Worshippers probably do not even have egos, being in such a benevolent and gendered-continuum state O'blyss.
5:18 PM
G. said...
Inclusive worshippers deserve to become the bearer of the torch of the New Humour. Even I am not willing to go to such lengths of sublimated irony. I have heard of people who really think and say such things. Now, whether or not they go to seminary on the other hand, is another thing entire.
5:55 PM
Anonymous said...
Okay, here is what I think we know for sure: the definitive Inclusive Worshipper is probably a Unitarian, has more than one partner... she went to Smith College or perhaps Swathmore, she has short brown hair, wears clothes made out of hemp, smokes, and has trouble pronouncing the letter 'r'. Okay, maybe she can pronounce the letter 'r'. But, I think she would be reluctant to take the Eucharist. Go to Chapel tomorrow, sing your show tunes, and examine who stays seated during the mass. BINGO. That's her. But stay clear...contents my explode under pressure.
6:44 PM
MM said...
I think it discredits inclusive worshippers' sense of humor to assume they are serious. And I have NEVER met a woman this funny. I aspire to it, but its a long way away.
6:45 PM
Anonymous said...
To the vindictive and closed-minded writers of the above entries,
You all should be ashamed. Inclusive worshippers are wonderful persons with arms open to the world and a heart full of non-judgmental charity. If you want to know her true identity, look into your own hearts and see the loving, free-spirited, ambi-sexual person you've always longed to be. Then you will know her. You will see her deep within yourself, in your heart. That is where the truth lies.
Your rigid categories, gender assumptions, and archaic stereo-types belong with your kind - in the neanderthal age. Inclusive worshippers fly like... birds. You wallow in the mud of your own phalic ignorance.
Show up to the charter meeting of the SPA (Seminarian's for Polyamory Awareness) this weekend. We'd love to see you there.
9:10 AM
Anonymous said...
It has got to be a joke...no worries MM...people aren't that dumb.
12:29 PM
MM said...
Inclusive worshippers, thanks for visiting! You are welcome here. I am merely EXPERIENCING you as "funny," having been conditioned to react thusly by various Male Oppressors who comment here. I was actually hoping for more womyn. Again, welcome. Make yourself at home.
posted by MM at 3:22 PM
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